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The Secret Sauce 

Carol Bower FootebyCarol Bower Foote
January 28, 2026
in Lifestyle
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“I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down/into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,/how to be idle and blessed.”  (1)
“When you turn around, starting here, lift this/new glimpse that you found; carry into evening/ all that you want from this day.” (2)

I was recently struck by a constellation of qualities used to describe a person whose light is infectious, someone deeply cherished by those they touch.  That constellation?
Attention, Gratitude, Delight.

I was particularly drawn to explore “Delight” and then realized how closely intertwined it is with the other two.  I thought to myself, this is the secret sauce to living a rich, full life.  Granted, it is not the only sauce seasoning such a life, but it must be a big part of the recipe.

The beloved poet, Mary Oliver, is known for her expression of delight in the details of life, especially the natural world.  She repeatedly reminds us that these details in which she takes such joy and satisfaction are available to us by paying attention.  To enjoy them , one must notice them.  The best poets pay attention to particulars and often find in them revelations of something deeper and more universal.  For Mary, these details are a source of wonder, appreciation, curiosity, cherishing, praise, simple sensory pleasure, or profound questions.

She doesn’t just notice them; she revels in them:  specific tiny movements of the grasshopper on her palm, each individual type of tree, the scarred fluke of a humpback whale, the symphony of goldfinches in a thistle field, the harsh call of wild geese overhead, forest  pockets of lichen and seeds, the fragrance of a rose, the face of a flower, the shy hands of a muskrat, the priest’s hand over a chalice, butter and eggs, the emergence of a green moth, to name a few.

The trick is to go beyond simple attention to finding the deep joy and satisfaction in details you notice.  In the curl of your granddaughter’s mouth when she offers her “imp smile”.   In the feel of the mallet in your hand as you shape the turning wood.  In the smell of freshly mown grass or toast in the morning.  Or the way the juice of the raspberry shoots into your mouth when you bite into it.  The glimpse of a muskrat gliding through early morning water.  A new knit cap.  The sound of your loved one’s car in the driveway as they arrive home.  Oh, there are millions!!

Where does this delight come from? Some might say Love.  I will go with Gratitude…deep appreciation for the gift and wonder of, the beauty in, that detail.  It’s unique offering.  If there are a million details, there are potentially a million gifts out in the world.  Feeling thankful can engender an abundance of delight in one’s life….which, by the way, is infectious.

One notices.  One feels thankful.  One delights.    Secret Sauce.

“It doesn’t have to be/the blue iris, it could be/ weeds in a vacant lot, or a few/small stones; just/pay attention, then patch/a few words together and don’t try to make them elaborate, this isn’t/a contest but the doorway/into thanks…..” (3)
“If you want to talk about this/come to visit.  I live in the house/near the corner, which I have named/Gratitude.” (4)

(1) from “The Summer Day” by Mary Oliver (New and Selected Poems, Volume One)
(2) from “You Reading This Be Ready” by William Stafford (You Reading This Be Ready)
(3) from “Praying” by Mary Oliver (Thirst)
(4) from “The Place I want to get back to” by Mary Oliver (Thirst)

Carol Bower Foote

Carol Bower Foote

A Trilogy, Rio Vista resident since 2002, Carol has lived in, boated on, and loved the Delta since 1985. She retired from a 28 year career at Apple, Inc. in 2014. Drawn to writing since she could form letters, Carol also finds special pleasure in live theater (viewing, acting, directing, dramaturgy), and discovering and sharing poetry by heart. She holds a B.S. degree in Psychology and Masters in Speech-Communication. Her life is enriched by her son and daughter-in-law who live in the Bay Area with her two young grandchildren, a girl and a boy. She is grateful to serve her community by creating the RioVision monthly article and weekly calendar, and by sharing the wisdom of poetry, lyrics, and other literature in her by-weekly column, ”Heart Beats”.

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